A Call To Arms
By Sherry Shriner
http://www.sherryshriner.com/

One of the biggest dilemmas facing many Christians today is what to do about the persecutions coming against believers in this country. Is there something we can do? Can we defend ourselves against being taken prisoner and becoming a victim to increasing tyrannical oppression from our own government?

Concentration camps have been built, transport trains have shackles lining the inside walls ready to lock people into place, and the New World of Satan is just around the corner. All just a declaration of martial law away.

Martial law is coming to this country whether it is publicly declared or not. This has been in planning for a long time through those at the highest levels of our government and military through traitorous presidents and politicians who have passed legislation guaranteeing a lockdown and police state. We are in the middle of a scripted phony war on terrorism to lead us eventually into martial law. This has all taken years, even decades of planning inside the secret societies that control Washington. It is not if it will happen, but when.

The New World Order is an overthrow of America, its Constitution, and its Patriotic and Christian citizens. It seeks to diminish and then demolish the constitution replacing it with Patriot Acts that take away our freedoms we had guaranteed under the constitution. No longer is there a right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Under the Patriot Acts and the New World Order, those who resist their tyrannical form of government have only one right, to die. And many will.

More likely than not, martial law will begin as a covert operation against Americans. Roundups will begin without public notice or mention of them. Mass amounts of people will be picked up at roadblocks, airports, and through middle of the night home invasions by organized military and government abduction squads.

In the name of terrorism and national defense our government will target dissidents of America who are against Satanism and the New World Order. Plans already leaked out and revealed by ex-intelligence agents reveal many dissidents are to be picked up out of their homes in the middle of the night. Anyone picked up whose name appears on an internment list will not have access to a lawyer and neither will their families have any idea where their loved one is being taken. In many instances perhaps entire families will be taken.

Dissident lists have been built from church tithing files (mandatory reporting to the state), library records, and government data collection and spying on internet forums, chat groups, lists, emails, group, organization and church affiliations etc..If you are a believer in the Most High your name is likely on a list. If you have spoken publicly about your belief in the Lord in any way, shape, or form, you are on a list. If you are not a Christian, but you have spoken publicly or belong to anti-new world order groups or organizations, you are on a list. The government tracks everything and everyone. If they perceive you as anything but a pro supporter of the New World Order your name is put on a list.

Should these dissidents, which will include mostly Christians, go silently and consider it as martyrdom? No. The Lord has always given His people protection against tyrannical governments and physical attacks from their enemies. It has always been a basic right to defend yourself against evil or harm. Who are our enemies? Those who act in contempt of God's laws and in this instance, physically seek to harm us with unlawful imprisonment and death.

Biblical law of self-defense empowers us to defend our lives against wicked men who hate God, His law, and the life of their neighbor. And this includes those trying to implement a Satanic New World Order in America who fulfill that criteria. We may assume that those who threaten us with bodily harm or weapons hold the life God has given us in contempt, and, therefore, we may defend ourselves against such evil even to the point of killing those who try to harm us. We are not to go down silently but to stand up against those who come up against us and defend our lives against them.

In the days of Noah Yahweh destroyed the world with a flood because of the wickedness and violence that had covered the whole land, and He knew that men were still wicked after the flood, so He commanded, "Whoso sheddeth man's blood, by man shall his blood be shed: for in the image of God made he man" ( Gen. 9:6 ). The Lord had decreed capital punishment for murderers. Our Founding Fathers drew upon millennia of Biblical teaching when giving us the right to keep and bear arms for self defense.

Our forefathers based their thought on the Sixth Commandment, "Thou shalt not kill" ( Ex. 20:13 ). A common interpretation was that the sixth commandment required every lawful means should be taken to preserve our own life and the life of others.

In other words, if murder was wrong, actions allowing murder, like not defending oneself or others, were also wrong. This was the "right of self-defense."

Our founders considered this one of the most basic of human rights. They accepted this as a right of all levels of society: the nation, the states, the counties, the family, and the individual. If right and wrong existed, and if murder was wrong, then citizens had the moral obligation to defend the good and innocent at whatever level.

Most refer to the Sixth Commandment that tells us "Thou shall not kill." This was incorrectly translated in English and should read, "Thou shalt not murder." In the chapters following, God gave to Moses many of the situations which require a death penalty. God clearly has not told us never to kill. He has told us not to murder, which means we are not to take an innocent life. If someone is trying to harm you or kill you, they are not innocent.

The Bible is full of stories promoting self-defense. One of the earliest tells of some men who kidnapped Lot, the patriarch Abraham's nephew. Abraham organized a militia and by force of arms rescued Lot from his kidnappers (Gen. 14:12 ).

Government Tyranny

Tyranny rises from within a nation when the government has been captured by men who use their power to oppress the people. Thus, the framers of the constitution recognized the need and right of citizens to keep and bear arms in order to insure real liberty.

Biblically speaking, tyranny exists when civil government departs from God's law and commands us to do things that are forbidden by God or forbids those things we are commanded by God to do.

Many Christians go through and twist every Scripture imaginable and take them out of context on how to deal with violence, tyranny, and oppression. It is no wonder God's laws made it's way into our constitution to be followed and guaranteed as inalienable rights of citizens to protect themselves, form militias and own weapons for their own self-defense. In God's laws and mirrored in our constitution we have or had, the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Now, in these prophetic "days of Noah" once again we are seeing wickedness and violence covering the land.

Today we are witnessing our "one nation under God" being turned into a nation under Satanic rule. How should Christians respond to this Satanic and government tyranny? Many people misinterpret the Apostle Peter. In 1 Peter 2:13-15 it says, "Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme; or unto governors as unto them sent by him for the punishment of evildoers, and for the praise of them that do well. For this is the will of God." Yes, we are to submit to government authority, unless they contradict God's laws which were protected and written into the Constitution.

In 1 Peter 2:13-14 the apostle exhorts believers to live honorably before men so that the charge that believers are evildoers will be proven false when their good works are seen by men and others can see they are law abiding citizens.

Interestingly, the first good work spoken of by Peter is submission to the laws of men as given by the rulers over them. He says, "Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man...." This is an all-encompassing command that requires Christians to obey the laws of the civil government that God has placed over them. They are to do this "for the Lord's sake;" in obedience to Him and for His glory. Peter explains that we are to obey the civil rulers or magistrate because they have been "sent by him for the punishment of evildoers, and for the praise of them that do well" ( 1 Pet. 2:14 ; . Peter then states unequivocally that it is God's will that we honor and obey the king and governors over us (1 Pet. 2:15) but that we are to always obey God first, the laws of man second.

One example of man's laws contradicting the Lord's can be found in Acts 5:39. The Apostles had been brought before the Jewish Sanhedrin because they had disobeyed a previous command from these authorities "not to speak at all nor teach in the name of Jesus" (Acts 4:18 ). The rulers angrily said to them: "Did not we straightly command you that ye should not teach in this name? and, behold, ye have filled Jerusalem with your doctrine and intend to bring this man's blood upon us" (Acts 5:28 ). To this charge of disobedience to their former command, "Peter and the other apostles answered and said, We ought to obey God rather than men" (Acts 5:29).

The apostles had been commanded by Jesus Christ to preach the gospel of salvation in His name to all men and nations The Jewish rulers directly contradicted this command. Given this evident contradiction between the command of God and the command of men, the course the apostles needed to take was clear, they must obey God even if it meant disobedience to earthly rulers.

This is the course that all Christians must take in a similar situation. When the laws or commands of a tyrant or tyrannical government directly contradict the clear precepts of God, then the Christian must choose to obey God rather than men. In such a case, God's law takes precedence over man's law, and civil disobedience is the path we must take.

All the Scriptures in the Bible in regards to government and authority can be summed up this way: Government was established by Yahweh for our own good. To protect the citizens and punish wrongdoers. To govern justly and for the people to obey their rulers. However when governments no longer are governing justly and showing contempt for God's laws and openly disobeying God and commanding us to do things contrary to God's laws then we are to obey God over established government.

Being obedient to the laws of society and established government glorifies God and contributes to the peace and well-being of a society. Christians should be known as those who respect government not those who foment rebellion and civil anarchy. However in cases where we must disobey the unlawful orders or rules of a government then we should make known our reasons for resistance to those laws and make clear our desire to uphold them but not if they become contrary to God's laws. The goal of all Christian resistance to tyranny is the establishment or re-establishment of Godly order in society.

There are different levels of government from local to national levels. If we are forced to disobey one level of authority then we must seek out another level of authority to represent our case against the one oppressing us. In this way we are upholding God's ordinance of government and glorifying Him in our resistance.

Acts 5:29 and 1 Peter 2:13-15 a teach important doctrine concerning the Christians obedience to the civil magistrate and how to respond to tyranny. They instruct us to obey both God and man; but if the commands of men contradict the express commands of God, we must give our obedience to God. Tyranny must be resisted, but only in accordance with God's Word.

If a tyrannical government exists at all levels, and there is none to seek help to, then the Christian is at odds with the entire established government and must resist it and disobey their rules and laws in order to keep God's laws. God's laws always take precedence over man's.

Does the Bible Teach Pacifism?

Many people, Christians included, assume that Christ taught pacifism. They cite Matthew 5:38-39 where in these verses Jesus said:

Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth: But I say unto you, that ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.

The Sermon on the Mount from which this passage is taken deals with righteous personal conduct and not seeking personal revenge against someone who has harmed you. In this passage, Yahushua is clearing up a confusion that had led people to think that conduct proper for the government to do, that is, taking vengeance on someone, was also proper for an individual to do.

Even the words used by Christ indicates that He was addressing a confusion, or a distortion, that was commonplace. Several times in the rest of the Sermon on the Mount Christ used this same "you have heard it said" figure of speech to straighten out misunderstandings or falsehoods being taught by the religious leaders of the times.

He wasn't teaching or introducing something new, in fact in the same passage He strongly condemned false teaching: "Whoever therefore breaks one of the commandments, and teaches men so, shall be called least in the kingdom of heaven..." (Matthew 5:19). Clearly, then, He was not teaching something different about self defense than is taught elsewhere in the Bible. Otherwise, He would be contradicting Himself for He would now be teaching men to break one of the commandments.

He was condemning taking vengeance on someone who insulted or hit you. It is this very passage that has been confused by Christian pacifists who would misinterpret the context of the passage in the Sermon on the Mount about turning the other cheek (which prohibits private vengeance) into a command to falter before the wicked.

The Bible distinguishes clearly between the duties of the government and the duties of an individual and that is what the "turn the other cheek" passage was about. He was telling the people through a parable to not seek personal revenge for a wrong done to you but to let the civil magistrate or what we call local police handle it and let them (courts) administer justice in the matter. Personal revenge and even "lynches" are forbidden.

Many who believe this is a command not to defend ourselves against attackers turn this into a command to thus falter before the wicked. They misunderstand the interpretation of Scripture and disobey Yahweh's commands to protect their life from attackers. This widespread misinterpretation is a clever deception by Satan welcomed into the churches to lull believers into pacifism and into error to keep them from defending themselves against the tyranny he then creates to come up against them with. How many believers over the centuries have died because they disobeyed Yahweh's commands to protect and defend themselves against their enemies? Millions.

Self Defense

Exodus 22:2-3 tells us "If the thief is found breaking in, and he is struck so that he dies, there shall be no guilt for his bloodshed. If the sun has risen on him, there shall be guilt for his bloodshed. He should make full restitution; if he has nothing, then he shall be sold for his theft." The context of this verse is dealing with theft and restitution and gives us a basis for God's law of Self-Defense.

The phrase found breaking up refers to breaking up the roof, window, or door to gain entry during the night hours. The owner of the house responds by killing the would-be thief. The declaration of Yahweh's law is that in these circumstances the owner is innocent of any wrongdoing, and is fully justified in using lethal force to defend himself and his family.

The second part of this passage deals with breaking up under different circumstances. In this case, it is during daylight hours when presumably the owner can see whether the intruder is armed and if he does or doesn't pose a threat to his personal safety, but is a mere thief. Yet, in spite of this the owner kills the thief. In this circumstance the owner is guilty of murder because it was not an act of self-defense because he wasn't threatened or attacked. The penalty for theft was restitution, not death. Thus in this instance it is an unauthorized taking of human life. God's law authorizes the protection of life by deadly force if necessary, but His law does not permit the defense of property in the same manner.

We are however, empowered through God's law of self-defense to defend our lives against wicked men who hate God, His law, and the life of their neighbor. Those who act contrary to God's laws and threaten us with bodily harm or weapons are acting in contempt of God's laws thus we may defend ourselves against these wicked people even to the point of killing them to protect ourselves and neighbors.

In Proverbs 25:26 we read that "A righteous man who falters before the wicked is like a murky spring and a polluted well." Certainly we would be faltering before the wicked if we chose to be unarmed and unable to protect ourselves against an assailant who might be threatening our life.

The Christian pacifist may try to argue that God has changed His mind from the time that He gave Moses the Ten Commandments in Exodus 20 or the provision for justifiably killing a thief in Exodus 22. In Malachi we read, "For I am the Lord, I do not change" (Malachi 3:6) and even in the New Testament it is reaffirmed, "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever" (Hebrews 13:8).

Does Jesus advocate violence? No. Does He advocate self defense? Yes.

The Christian pacifist will likely object even still because Christ rebuked Peter who used a sword to cut off the ear of Malchus, a servant of the high priest in the company of a detachment of troops. But look at it in the context of what happened. Jesus told Peter in Matthew 26:52-54:

Then said Jesus unto him, Put up again thy sword into his place: for all they that take the sword shall perish with the sword. Thinkest thou that I cannot now pray to my Father, and he shall presently give me more than twelve legions of angels? But how then shall the Scriptures be fulfilled, that thus it must be?

It was not the first time that Christ had to explain to the disciples why He had come to earth. To fulfill the Scriptures the Son of God had to redeem mankind from sin and the penalty of death (also see John 18:10-11). Even yet many use the phrase "those who live by the sword die by the sword" as a battlecry to not defend themselves. This phrase isn't even found in John's account of the same passage and it has nothing to do with a proclamation against self-defense or it would be contradicting all the other numerous passages in the Bible where Yahweh says to arm and protect yourselves.

While Christ told Peter to "put your sword in its place" He clearly did not say get rid of it or throw it out. That would have contradicted what he told the disciples only hours earlier. Peter's sword was to protect his own life from danger. His sword was not needed to protect the King of kings. Jesus was going to lay down His life for mankind and the disciples never understood it until after He arose from the grave.

Trusting God or Disobeying Him?

Another question asked by Christians is "Doesn't having a gun imply a lack of trust that God will take care of us?" Indeed, God will take care of us. He has also told us that if we love Him, we will keep His commandments (John 14:15).

Those who trust God work for a living, knowing that 1 Timothy 5:8 tells us "But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse that an unbeliever." For a man not to work, yet expect to eat because he was "trusting God" would actually be to defy God.

King David wrote in Psalm 46:1 that God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. This did not conflict with praising the God "Who trains my hand for war and my fingers for battle" (Psalm 144:1). The doctrine of Scripture is that we prepare and work, but we trust the outcome to God. It is also David who prophesied that in the last days the Lord's people would do exploits. In other words, they are fighting and resisting the tyranny rule of a tyrannical government. This does not sound like we are to be sheep and herded willingly to slaughter!

If we are to obey God then we are to make adequate provision for our own defense as we are instructed in the Bible. For a man to refuse to provide adequately for his and his family's defense would be to defy God.

There are many who claim "I don't need to arm myself. God will protect me." When Satan was tempting Jesus in the wilderness, he challenged Jesus to throw himself off the top of the temple. Satan reasoned that God's angels would protect him. Jesus responded: "It is written again, 'You shall not tempt the Lord your God.'" (Matthew 4:7). It may seem pious if one is trusting in God for protection, and we all must, but it is tempting God if we do not take the commands that He has laid out for us in the Bible for our own defense.

This point is reflected in the legal doctrine of the United States. Repeatedly, courts have held that the government has no responsibility to provide individual security. One case (Bowers v. DeVito) put it this way: "there is no constitutional right to be protected by the state against being murdered." And that is how government has always been and why Yahweh put personal self defense of oneself and their families into their own hands. Peter carried a sword, a weapon of self defense and attempted to use it to protect Yahushua from the Roman soldiers but Yahushua didn't need defending because prophecy had to be fulfilled that He die. And that is why He stopped Peter. So prophecy could be fulfilled not because what he did was wrong.

Some might say, "Let the police protect the citizens." But this is flawed. First of all, the right of a community to protect itself through community defense is founded on the same moral ground as the right of individual defense. But what if the police themselves become the aggressors of a tyrannical government and don't seek to help you but to hurt you? We haven't seen that yet in America, but we will.

Also, even without what is coming ahead and looking at daily matters we face now, the police are simply unable to protect us at all times! Every individual murder in this country proves the limitations of community defense. Community defense is good, but it can never replace individual self-defense and the responsibility of the individual to be able to protect themselves.

A Mirror of Things To Come

Our future is one of death, destruction, and the arrival of the Antichrist. Events leading up to his arrival are what we are faced with daily as our country and governments work scripted plans to destroy each other preparing the way for Satan's arrival.

Countries working together to destroy each other? Yes. The leaders of most governments today are possessed by Satan and his cohorts and are doing as he tells them to do. They are puppets who gave their allegiance to him and follow whatever he tells them to do. Their loyalty is to him, not their countries. Satan has a plan on how he's going to take over the world and the humans leading it are just possessed pawns and puppets of his.

The Bible reveals a great deal about the relationship between righteousness, which exalts a nation, and the obligation for a national and personal self defense.

It makes clear that in times of national rebellion against the Lord, the rulers of the nation will reflect the same spiritual degradation of the people and as a result there becomes a denial of God's commandments, an arrogance of power, disarmament of the people, and oppression.

For example, every time the people of ancient Israel apostacized from the faith they found themselves oppressed under the rule of their Judges. Worse yet, they couldn't even defend themselves, Judges 5:8 tells us that, "They chose new gods; then there was war in the gates; not a shield or spear was seen among forty thousand in Israel."

The first book of Samuel tells of the turning away of Israel from God. The people did not want to be governed by God; they wanted to have and be ruled by a king like the surrounding pagan, God-hating nations. Samuel warned the people what they were getting into the curses (laid out in Deuteronomy chapters 28&29) that would be upon them if they persisted in raising up a king over themselves and their families. Included in those curses was the raising up of a standing, professional army which would take their sons and their daughters for aggressive wars (I Samuel 8:11).

Saul was the result of all the judgments that Samuel had warned the people about. Saul was the king the Israelites wanted and got. Saul didn't trust the Lord and he rebelled against Him by putting himself above God. And for those reasons the nation was destroyed. It was under Saul that the Philistines were able to defeat the Jews and put them into bondage. So great was the bondage exerted by the Philistines that "Now there was no blacksmith to be found throughout all the land of Israel: for the Philistines said, 'Lest the Hebrews make them swords or spears.' But all the Israelites went down to the Philistines to sharpen each man's plowshare, his mattock, his ax, and his sickle;...So it came about, on the day of battle, that there was neither sword nor spear found in the hand of any of the people who were with Saul and Jonathan..." (1 Samuel 13:19-20; 22-23).

Today, the same goals of the Philistines of disarming the people is slowly being carried out by our own government. The sword control of the Philistines is today's gun control of governments that do not trust their people with guns and do not want them resisting their tyranny against them. A protection we have under our Constitution to resist tyranny, form militias, and defend ourselves against those who would try and harm us.

It is indeed up to the Patriots and Christians of America to defend the Constitution of America against the tyrannical New World Order government that seeks to eliminate it and them.

It is important to understand that what happened to the Jews at the time of Saul was not unexpected according to the sanctions spelled out by God in Leviticus 26 and Deuteronomy 28. In the first parts of those chapters, blessing are promised to a nation that keeps God's laws. In the second half of those chapters, the curses are spelled out for a nation that comes under judgment for their rebellion against God.

In Deuteronomy 28:47- 48 it reveals the reason for Israel's oppression by the Philistines during Saul's reign:

Because you did not serve the Lord your God with joy and gladness of heart, for the abundance of all things, therefore you shall serve your enemies, whom the Lord will send against you, in hunger, in thirst, in nakedness, and in need of all things; and He will put a yoke of iron on your neck until He has destroyed you.

This is the same judgment we are facing as a nation today. Our government has turned its back on God's laws and are passing their own that are contrary to God's laws. The Patriot Acts 1 and 2 are contrary to God's laws.

The Israelite army was a militia army and when they gathered for battle each man would bring his own weapons. They were personally armed and ready for battle from the time of Moses, through the Judges, and beyond. When threatened by the Midianites, for example, "So Moses spoke to the people, saying, 'Arm some of yourselves for the war, and let them go against the Midianites to take vengeance for the Lord on Midian'" (Numbers 31:3).

It is our biblical heritage to bear and keep arms. During David's time in the wilderness avoiding capture by Saul, "David said to his men, 'Every man gird on his sword.' So every man girded on his sword, and David also girded on his sword" (Samuel 25:13). In other words, not only was David and his men armed, they would have fought to resist being captured by Saul's men.

Nehemiah and his men rebuilt the gates and walls of Jerusalem with a weapon at their sides.

They which builded on the wall, and they that bare burdens, with those that laded, every one with one of his hands wrought in the work, and with the other hand held a weapon. For the builders, every one had his sword girded by his side, and so builded. And he that sounded the trumpet was by me (Neh. 4:17:18).

The wording of the Constitution is consistent and in alignment with the teachings of the Bible. Weapons of defense should be dispersed throughout the nation, not concentrated in the hands of a central government. A government honoring the Lord and His laws has no cause to want a monopoly of force and when it does it threatens the lives, liberty and property of its citizens and is operating in opposition to the Most High God.

Our government is increasingly turning its back on Yahweh. They have kicked him out of our schools and many of our government buildings. If Jesus Christ is not our King and our nation no longer held under Godly laws then we will have a dictator ruling over us, just as Samuel warned. And that is exactly what is happening today with the increasing gun control laws and the eventual elimination of the second amendment to own and possess weapons.

In self defense killing someone is justified. If you believe the Bill of Rights is a mirror of the Bible and protections the Lord laid down for His people, then being secure in your own person (second and fourth amendments) is one of those rights. You have a right to defend yourself and your family.

Defending yourself from death or harm is not the same as murder. Murder is the intent to kill someone with aforethought or during the course of an action taken that leads to the murder of someone, like getting in a fight, or auto accident. Laws are established to determine the difference between accidentally killing someone and the intent of murdering someone on purpose.

You have a right to defend yourself. The reason the Jews walked to their deaths via the trains in the holocaust is because they were deceived, they didn't know they were going to their deaths, and those who did, didn't have a weapon to protect themselves. In these last days, knowing persecution is coming, do you defend yourself or willingly go to be tortured and killed and die as a martyr?

For those who think that God treated Israel differently from the way He will treat us today, please consider what God told the prophet Malachi: "For I am the Lord, I do not change..." (Malachi 3:6).

Yahweh told me this:

My child, many seek the answer of life and death in these last days. Many will seek Me and not find Me because they can't hear My voice or listen to My voice. Child tell them that many will be tested for My Name's sake, but he that endures will be awarded the Crown of Life. Many coming against them are purely evil and of the evil one. It is a war against My people just as it has been for centuries. It will escalate on a global scale.
Tell them to fight to defend their children, to protect their loved ones, I will not hold them accountable. Many won't have a chance, they will be taken by surprise and unprepared and marched to the camps. Martial law will come before My hour of testing. It is martial law where they will seek to destroy my people without mercy, it is not the hour of testing where I test My people. These are separate events.

Those who lay down their lives for Me do so because they refuse to worship the image of the beast or receive his name in their forehead or right hand. But those events will come after much bloodshed in this country. Protect yourselves. Self defense is of Me when foreign soldiers seek to invade your homes and harm you or loved ones, I have never told My people to just lay over and die when opposition is in front of them but to seek Me and become overcomers and victors in warfare.

Tell them child there is a difference between warfare that is coming and martyrdom that will come later.

Tell them.


I had a dream last night, on May 18, 2005 and in it I was with my children and we were at some place where there were a lot of people outside, a field, or grassy area, or park, somewhere...and all of a sudden this red cloudish air came out of nowhere and started engulfing the people.

Many were killed instantly, perhaps thousands, hundreds, I couldn't really tell how many people were there, but it was a lot of people. Some were choking and gasping for air and I could hear them as I took my kids and started running toward a nearby church.

One of the things I saw as I was running was that there were these people in some kind of black uniforms and they had buckets in their hands and with huge ladles were pouring some kind of substance over the dead people laying on the ground. They seemed unaffected by the red gas in the air. I don't know how they got their so quick, they were just there, everywhere.

The substance they were pouring over the people almost looked like some kind of lava, it's the best I can describe it. Somehow we had a blanket with us and we sunk down in between two pews of the church and put the blanket over us as I asked Yahweh for protection.

I heard one of those people or beings, not sure what they were, walk into the church and eventually found us hiding. I could hear him standing there staring at us for a few seconds and then he walked away without harming us.

I had to wake myself up it or was I awake already, I don't know, at that point I don't think I was asleep anymore but I got out of bed and my thoughts on it immediately were that we must do anything at all cost to protect ourselves when attacks come. Giving in and just dying is not martyrdom, it's voluntary murder. You are allowing someone to kill you. There were many others at that same place watching the red cloud envelope people and just stood there watching it happen, they did nothing to protect themselves and ended up dying as a result.

Yahweh has given us a gift of life. And we are to honor it. We are to attempt to do something to protect our lives when in danger of being harmed or killed. Do your part and just trust Him for the outcome and you are not at fault for not trying to do something, anything, to stay alive and keep the life He's given you. How can you honor Him with your life if you won't even defend it?

Like sheep to the slaughter is not of Yahweh. Defend yourselves and your lives against the wicked who attempt to slaughter you. Don't let the wolves in political and religious garments lull you to sleep with theological psychology and ungodly legislation to the point you don't think it's of God to defend yourself against them. Stand up and defend your life if you are threatened of harm, do something. Defend yourself, now that is of Yahweh.

The time will come when the people of this nation will be herded up as cattle and headed to death camps. An American holocaust. Resist being taken to them at all cost and don't be taken without a fight. These camps are going to be used for sexual abuse and torture. Many will suffer greatly before they die or are killed.

I can't even put into words the horrors that are coming to this nation. Many will say, "God will protect me" and I'm telling you that HE is telling you to arm yourselves and defend yourselves and that IS how He is protecting you. He is warning you now to prepare for later.

Do you have any idea what they plan on doing to your children in these camps? To you, your mother, father, brother, sister, husband, wife? Your children will become sex toys for the sadistic soldiers running the camps, women and men will be repeatedly raped, beaten, burned, cut up and slowly tortured to death.

Wake up Israel-America! Defend yourselves! Don't be taken alive!

Mysterious red cells might be aliens
By Jebediah Reed
Popular Science

Friday, June 2, 2006; Posted: 12:36 p.m. EDT (16:36 GMT)

As bizarre as it may seem, the sample jars brimming with cloudy, reddish rainwater in Godfrey Louis's laboratory in southern India may hold, well, aliens.

In April, Louis, a solid-state physicist at Mahatma Gandhi University, published a paper in the prestigious peer-reviewed journal Astrophysics and Space Science in which he hypothesizes that the samples -- water taken from the mysterious blood-colored showers that fell sporadically across Louis's home state of Kerala in the summer of 2001 -- contain microbes from outer space.

Specifically, Louis has isolated strange, thick-walled, red-tinted cell-like structures about 10 microns in size. Stranger still, dozens of his experiments suggest that the particles may lack DNA yet still reproduce plentifully, even in water superheated to nearly 600 degrees Fahrenheit . (The known upper limit for life in water is about 250 degrees Fahrenheit .)

So how to explain them? Louis speculates that the particles could be extraterrestrial bacteria adapted to the harsh conditions of space and that the microbes hitched a ride on a comet or meteorite that later broke apart in the upper atmosphere and mixed with rain clouds above India.

If his theory proves correct, the cells would be the first confirmed evidence of alien life and, as such, could yield tantalizing new clues to the origins of life on Earth.

Last winter, Louis sent some of his samples to astronomer Chandra Wickramasinghe and his colleagues at Cardiff University in Wales, who are now attempting to replicate his experiments; Wickramasinghe expects to publish his initial findings later this year.

Meanwhile, more down-to-earth theories abound. One Indian government investigation conducted in 2001 lays blame for what some have called the "blood rains" on algae.

Other theories have implicated fungal spores, red dust swept up from the Arabian peninsula, even a fine mist of blood cells produced by a meteor striking a high-flying flock of bats.

Louis and his colleagues dismiss all these theories, pointing to the fact that both algae and fungus possess DNA and that blood cells have thin walls and die quickly when exposed to water and air.

More important, they argue, blood cells don't replicate. "We've already got some stunning pictures -- transmission electron micrographs -- of these cells sliced in the middle," Wickramasinghe says. "We see them budding, with little daughter cells inside the big cells."

Louis's theory holds special appeal for Wickramasinghe. A quarter of a century ago, he co-authored the modern theory of panspermia, which posits that bacteria-riddled space rocks seeded life on Earth.

"If it's true that life was introduced by comets four billion years ago," the astronomer says, "one would expect that microorganisms are still injected into our environment from time to time. This could be one of those events."

The next significant step, explains University of Sheffield microbiologist Milton Wainwright, who is part of another British team now studying Louis's samples, is to confirm whether the cells truly lack DNA. So far, one preliminary DNA test has come back positive.

"Life as we know it must contain DNA, or it's not life," he says. "But even if this organism proves to be an anomaly, the absence of DNA wouldn't necessarily mean it's extraterrestrial."

Louis and Wickramasinghe are planning further experiments to test the cells for specific carbon isotopes. If the results fall outside the norms for life on Earth, it would be powerful new evidence for Louis's idea, of which even Louis himself remains skeptical.

THE RELIGIOUS RIGHT HAS FLED THE BATTLEFIELD
By Pastor Chuck Baldwin

June 9, 2006

I want to begin this column with one of my all-time favorite quotes. It comes from the great German reformer Martin Luther. He said, "If I profess with the loudest voice and clearest exposition every portion of the truth of God except precisely that little point which the world and the devil are at that moment attacking, I am not confessing Christ, however boldly I may be professing Christ. Where the battle rages, there the loyalty of the soldier is proved; and to be steady on all the battlefield besides is mere flight and disgrace if he flinches at that point."

Luther's trenchant statement reminds us that today's Christians, especially our Christian leaders, are not confessing Christ. Oh, they may host large crowds in their worship services; they may deposit multiplied millions of dollars in their financial accounts; they may receive thunderous applause from politicians, but they are not confessing Christ! Why? Because they are totally absent from the field of battle where the devil is attacking! I mean totally absent!

For the record, the real battlefield today is not abortion. It is not homosexual marriage. It is not Social Security. It is not al Qaeda. It is not taxes. It is not inflation. It is not electing conservatives. It is not posting the Ten Commandments. That is not to say that those issues are not important and not deserving of our best efforts and attention. We have fought and continue to fight for those issues. But those issues do not represent the major battlefield today.

The battlefield where the devil has amassed his greatest forces and is thrusting his deadliest armies is the surrender of our national sovereignty and independence, and the creation of global government! Yes, Martha, the devil has targeted the United States for destruction, and he is using our own political leaders to do his diabolical work! Furthermore, unless God awakens His people, especially His preachers, America's fall will be swift, and few will even notice that it happened-until it's too late.

Obviously, the surrender of our independence has been ongoing for some time. However, under Bill Clinton and especially under G.W. Bush, the pace has quickened exponentially! Doubtless, the biggest reason President Bush has more aggressively hastened the pace of America's merger into supranational government is because he enjoys widespread support among evangelical Christians. Absent opposition from Christian leaders, G.W. Bush has virtually had a free hand. And please know this: before Bush was a Republican, before he was a "conservative," before he was a Christian, he was and is a globalist, as was his father and grandfather before him!

Of course, the other reason Bush has been free to behave lawlessly is due to the fact that the GOP controls both houses of Congress. Absent political opposition from the legislature (or the national media, for that matter), Bush has virtually no impediment to his actions. For all intents and purposes, President Bush has been able to conduct business as a de facto dictator. There are no checks and balances at work today.

Because our national Christian leaders are content to revel in the lap of political cronyism with President Bush [a.k.a. special “pastoral” visits with Bush...] , they have abandoned their positions as watchmen on the wall. Instead of being watchmen and heralds of truth, they have become political lackeys and toadies for Bush. As a result, the message of truth must be carried by others. At the moment, I don't know anyone who is more faithfully engaged in the real battle for America than Jerome Corsi.

Many of you know Corsi as the man who co-authored the Number 1 New York Times best-seller, "Unfit for Command: Swift Boat Veterans Speak Out Against John Kerry." Corsi recently wrote two columns that every American should read. One was carried by Human Events Online and the other one was carried by World Net Daily. I urge my readers to read both of these columns.

Jerome Corsi holds a Ph.D. from Harvard University in political science. He is not some fringe-radical. (Not that Harvard hasn't produced its own radicals!) Furthermore, it doesn't appear that he embraces any particular religious persuasion. If he does, I haven't heard about it. However, Corsi is doing what our religious leaders should be doing, but aren't: he is sounding the trumpet of truth for the real battlefield.

In a nutshell, Corsi warns us that President Bush is secretly working to merge the United States into a trilateral government with Canada and Mexico. Corsi maintains that back in March of 2005, Bush, Mexican President Vicente Fox, and (then) Canadian Prime Minister Paul Martin entered into an agreement which binds the three countries into a regional or hemispheric government. Corsi insists that this is one of the central reasons why Bush is so adamant about granting amnesty to Mexico's illegal aliens. Bush is simply following through with his commitment to Fox and Martin. (This is also why Bush will doubtless issue a "guest worker" Executive Order or Signing Statement should the House of Representatives refuse to accept the Senate's amnesty bill. Bush has repeatedly demonstrated his willingness to circumvent Congress by issuing executive directives to get his way. [Read: http://www.boston.com/news/nation/articles/2006/04/30/examples_of_the_presidents_signing_statements ]

Corsi also notes that this new hemispheric country already has a name. It is called the North American Union, and it is being created without any input (or even knowledge) from our legislative or judicial branches of government. The official name of the agreement made between the three leaders is the "Security and Prosperity Partnership of North America" (SPP). Obviously, the new North American Union is modeled after the already established European Union (EU).

The SPP (North American Union) already has headship. Three top cabinet level officers from each country have been selected. Corsi writes, "Representing the United States are Secretary of Commerce Carlos Gutierrez, Secretary of Homeland Security Michael Chertoff, and Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. Representing Mexico are Secretario de Economia Fernando Canales, Secretario de Gobernacion Carlos Abascal, and Secretario de Relaciones Exteriores, Luis Ernesto Derbez. Representing Canada are Minister of Industry David L. Emerson, Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Public Safety, Anne McLellan, and Minister of Foreign Affairs Pierre Stewart Pettigrew."

Corsi further writes, "According to the signed 'Memorandum of Understanding,' the only borders or tariffs which would remain would be those around the continent, not those between the countries within." Then quoting from the Memorandum he writes, "Its (the North American Community's) boundaries will be defined by a common external tariff and an outer security perimeter within which the movement of PEOPLE [emphasis mine], products, and capital will be legal [that's why Bush wants to legalize illegal aliens in the U.S.], orderly and safe. Its goal will be to guarantee a free, secure, just, and prosperous North America." (page 3)

Folks, please notice, this Memorandum does not call for a free, secure, just, and prosperous United States, but a free, secure, just, and prosperous NORTH AMERICA! President Bush has already committed the United States to a regional or hemispheric government! When completed, this regional government will control everything relative to the "security" and "prosperity" of this new North American Union. That includes everything relating to travel, law enforcement, trade, education, military matters, etc. In other words, EVERYTHING!

Please remember, too, that all of this is being done without any input from the American people or their elected representatives at the state or federal level. I would even dare say that the vast majority of congressmen and senators are completely oblivious to the fact that this is even happening. With the attention of the American people (and Congress) focused on the Middle East, Bush and his cabal of elitists are moving forward with plans to surrender our national independence and merge our country into a regional government. Friends, this is the real war; this is the real battlefield!

When America loses its sovereignty and independence, we will lose all of our fundamental liberties. The Constitution will be meaningless and irrelevant. The Bill of Rights will be moot. The principles of religious liberty, the right to life, and the Christian foundation of our country will be passé. And, as I said at the outset of this column, our national leaders, especially our Christian leaders, are totally absent from this battlefield! And they should know better!

Any preacher worth his salt knows that world government (including regional or hemispheric government) is a history-long ambition of the Evil One. Ever since Babel, Satan has inspired power-hungry men to defy God's standard of independent nationalism set forth in His Word and seek global domination. True men of God also know that only Christ's kingdom can be justly universal and that any attempt to circumvent or steal His kingdom is devilish by definition! So, why do they sit back and say nothing as George W. Bush does the devil's bidding?

The surrender of our national sovereignty and independence is where the battle currently rages, it is where the devil is at this moment attacking. Where is the Religious Right? To use Luther's assessment, they are not confessing Christ, however boldly they may be professing Christ. They have flinched and fled in the face of battle. Their actions are truly disgraceful!

© 2006 Chuck Baldwin - All Rights Reserved

St. Louis Post Dispatch, June 10, 2002.

No responsibility

I am a life-long Catholic, raised in Alton. I recently tried to enroll my 2-year-old son in St. Mary's Catholic Church preschool program. Part of his enrollment paperwork was a form that included a special note that reads as follows, "The Diocese of Springfietd and/or St. Mary's Parish will not assume any responsibility or liability for any person who inflicts bodily injury or personal injury consisting of or arising out of corporal punishment, sexual or physical abuse, sexual exploitation or any other similar act, harm, injury or damage to any person in its programs or activities."
I almost fell out of my seat when my wife showed me this. In a time like this, the church needs to be reassuring people that acts like this won't happen. Instead it sends the message that abuse will happen and I, as a parent, can't do any thing about it.

Matt Taul
Alton



The documentation following here is just a small glimpse into the true reality as seen in the testimony of a Nun who escaped (not related to above story):

The Testimony of Charlotte Wells*
*This is a pseudonym. Sister Charlotte
never gave her real name in public.

First of all I always like to tell folk I'm not giving this testimony because I have any ill feeling in my heart toward the Roman Catholic people. I couldn't be a Christian if I still had bitterness in my heart. God delivered me from all bitterness and strife and delivered me out of all of that one day and made himself real to me, and the power of the Holy Spirit. And so, when I give this testimony I'm giving it because after God saved me he delivered me out of the convent and out of bondage and darkness. The Lord laid the burden upon my heart to give this testimony that others might know what cloistered convents are. And so, as you listen carefully this afternoon, I trust I will not say one thing that will leave any feeling in your heart whatsoever that I don't carry a burden for the Roman Catholic people. I don't like the things they do, I don't agree with the things that they teach, but I covet their soul for Jesus. I'm interested in their souls. I believe Jesus went to Calvary. He died that you and I might know Him. And their souls are just as precious as your soul and my soul. So I'm interested.

First of all, as we slip into this testimony, having been born in Roman Catholicism, not knowing anything else, not knowing the word of God because we didn't have a Bible in our home, we had never heard anything about this wonderful plan of salvation. And so, naturally, I grew up in that Roman Catholic home as a child, knowing only the catechism, knowing only the teaching of the Roman Catholic Church. And, because I loved the Lord, and because I wanted to do something for Him, I wanted to give Him my life. I didn't know of any other way for a Roman Catholic girl to give her life to God other than entering a convent, and to going to the confessional box where, naturally, I'm under the influence of my father-confessor, the Roman Catholic priest, his influence over my life.

One day I made up my mind through his influence and one of my teachers in the parochial school that I wanted to be a little sister. At that time I thought of being a sister of the open order, but as I went on into this, up until the time I took my white veil, sixteen and a half years of age, everything was beautiful. I really didn't have any fear in my heart whatsoever. Everything that was taught to me was seemingly along the line that I had been taught in the church before I entered the convent. And so one day, after having been, uh, after making up my mind to enter a convent, I remember that particular day, two of the sisters came home with me from school. They were my teachers. And when we arrived at my father's home that afternoon our Father-confessor was in the home likewise. I often say when I was a little girl children were seen and not heard. You didn't talk when you was a child, at least in my family, in my home unless you were spoken to. And I remember I listened to them carry on a conversation, and then I moved over close enough to my father and I asked him if I could say something. And that was a bit out of the ordinary. And he permitted me to talk and I said, "Dad, I want to go into a convent." And I will tell you that priest took it up quickly. He had already been influencing me. My father broke down and began to cry, not because he's sad, but he's very happy. My mother came over and took me in her arms and she, too, wept tears. She's very happy. Those were not tears of sadness because to think her little girl was giving her life to the convent to pray for lost humanity. And naturally my family were very thrilled about it, and I was too. But, anyway I didn't go for a year after that and then the time come when I got myself ready and my mother prepared things for me. And so I entered the convent.

CONVENT SCHOOL

They took me and we didn't have a place close enough to my father and mother's home so I think they took me around a thousand miles away from home where I entered a convent boarding school. I lacked about 3 months being 13 years of age. Just a little girl. I look back on it now and I think, "My!" Homesick? I was so homesick, why my mother and daddy, they stayed three days with me and when they left I became so homesick! Naturally. And why shouldn't I? Just a baby away from home. When I was a little girl, you know I never spent a night away from my mother, and I surely had never gone any place without my family. And naturally there was a close tie in our family and I was very lonely and very homesick. But I'll never forget that after Mother told me good-bye and I knew they were traveling a long distance away from me, and I had never realized in my heart, "I'll never see them again!" Naturally I hadn't planned it like that because I had planned to be a sister of the open order. But, if you'll listen carefully to this portion of the testimony, then you'll understand just why I'm saying some of the things I say. Now oftentimes we say that the priest selects his material through the confessional box, because at seven years of age I went to confessional. Seven years of age I would always, when I came into the church, first I'd slip over to the feet of the crucifix, or rather to the Virgin Mary, and then over at the feet of the crucifix and I'd ask the Virgin Mary to help me make a good confession, because I was a child and my heart was honest. And I knew the priest had taught us to always make a good confession. Keep nothing back. Tell everything if I expected absolution from any sin that I might have committed. And so I would ask the Virgin Mary to help me make a good confession. I would ask then Jesus to help me make a good confession. And you know, I'll assure you, after I'd lived in the convent for ,,,I had to go on with my schooling. I had just finished the eighth grade and they promised to give me a high school education and some college education. But, I didn't get much college, I got mostly just high school training. And they gave that to me alright. I took it under some terrible difficulties and strains and all of that. It was terribly difficult. But they gave it to me for which I appreciate very very much. But I'll assure you that after they put me through the crucial training that we must go through just to become a little initiate entering a convent. The training is really, it's outstanding as far as a nun is concerned and you know what it's all about after you've been in there a little while.

So now I've entered the convent and for just a few minutes I want to tell you just how we lived, what we eat, how we sleep. If I take you into the convent and tell you those things you'll understand a little bit more about my testimony. At first as I entered the convent as a small child I went on to school, but I was being trained. But the day came when I was fourteen and a half. The mother came to me and she began to tell me about the White Veil. And I didn't know too much about it, but in taking the white veil they told me that I would be becoming the spouse or bride of Jesus Christ. There would be a ceremony and I would be dressed in a wedding garment. And on this particular morning they told me at nine o'clock they would dress me up in a wedding garment. Now you're wondering where that come from and how they get the wedding clothes for the little nuns? The mother superior sits down and writes a letter to my father and tells him how much money she wants. And then whatever she asks, my father sends it. The little buying sister goes out and buys the material and the wedding gown is made by the nuns of the cloister. I'm still Open Order now. And of course whatever she asked, now you say, "Did they spend all the money for the wedding gown?" Well, of course we don't know these things in the very beginning of our testimony, but after we live in a convent for a little while we learned to know they could ask my father for a hundred dollars and he'd send it. They wouldn't but maybe a third of that for the wedding garment. They would keep the rest of it and my father would never know the difference. Neither did I until I lived in the convent for a period of time and I had to make some of the wedding clothes and then I knew the value of them and what they cost. And I knew of the money that came in because I was one of the older nuns. Well, alright, the time came, of course, when I walked down that aisle and I was dressed in a wedding garment. Now you know in the convent I used to walk the fourteen stations of the cross- the fourteen steps that Jesus carried the cross to Calvary. But after I had made up my mind to take the white veil, never again did I walk. I wanted to be worthy. I wanted to be holy enough to become the spouse or the bride of Jesus Christ. And so I would get down on my knees and crawl the fourteen stations. Quite a distance, but I crawled them every Friday morning. I felt it would make me holy. I felt it would draw me closer to God. It would make me worthy of the step that I was going to take. And that's what I wanted more than anything else in the world. I would like to impress upon your heart, every little girl that enters the convent that I know anything about. That child has a desire to live for God. That child has a desire to give her heart, mind, and soul to God. Now many, many people make this remark and we hear it from various types of folk who say only bad women go into convents. That isn't true. There are movie stars who go into convents. They've lived out in the world, and no doubt they are sinners and all of that. But they go in when they are women. They know what they are doing. And they go in only because the Roman Catholic Church is going to receive, not only thousands, but yea it will run up into the millions of dollars. They don't mind who they take in if they can get a lot of money out of that individual. But the ordinary little girl that goes in as a child, she's just a child and she goes in there with a heart and mind and soul just as clean as any child could be. I say that because sometimes you hear a lot of things that are really not true. Now after we become the spouse of Jesus Christ, I want you to listen carefully to this and then you can follow me into the rest of the testimony. We are now looked upon as married women. We are looked upon as married women. We are the spouse or the bride of Jesus Christ. Now the priest teaches every little girl that will take the white veil, they'll become the bride of Christ. He teaches her to believe that her family will be saved. It doesn't make any difference how many banks they've robbed, how many stores they've robbed. It doesn't make any difference how they drink and smoke and carouse and live out in this sinful world and do all the things that sinners do. It doesn't make a bit of difference. Still our family will be saved if we continue to live in the convent and give our lives to the convent or to the church we can rest assured that every member of our immediate family will be saved. And you know there are many little children that are influenced and enticed to go into convents because we realize it is the salvation for our families. And sometimes, even (in) Roman Catholic families, the children grow up and leave the Roman Catholic Church and go out into the deepest of sin. And so, every little girl that enters the convent is hoping by her sacrificing so much, home and loved ones, mother and daddy, everything that a child loves, her family will be saved regardless of what sins they commit. And of course we are children and our minds are immature and we don't know any better. And it's so easy to instill things like this into the hearts and minds of little children and the priest is - he's really good at it. And, of course, we look upon our priest, our father-confessor, I looked upon him as God. He's the only God I knew anything about, and to me he was infallible. I didn't think he could sin. I didn't think that he would lie. I didn't think that he ever made a mistake. I looked upon him as the holiest of holy because I didn't know a God, but I did know the Roman Catholic Priest, and to me, I looked to him for everything that I asked of God, so to speak. I believed the priest could give it to me. And so the day comes when all of us now, as we're going in (I want you to listen carefully) after taking the white veil things are beautiful. I'm sixteen and a half years of age. Everyone's good to me and I'm living in the convent and I haven't seen anything yet because no little girl, we're not subject to a Roman Catholic Priest until we are 21 years of age, and as we give you this next vow then you'll understand we don't know about this. This is kept from the little sisters until we've taken our black veils and then it's too late. I don't carry the key to those double doors and there's no way for me to come out. The priest will tell all over the whole United States and other countries that sisters, or nuns rather, can walk out of convents when they want to. I spent 22 years there. I did everything there was to do to get out. I've carried tablespoons with me into the dungeons and tried to dig down into that dirt, because there's no floors in those places, but I've never yet found myself digging far enough to get out of a convent with a tablespoon and that's about the only instrument. Because when we're using the spade, and we do have to do hard heavy work, when we use a spade we're being guarded. We're being watched by two older nuns and they're going to report on us and I'll assure your not going to try to dig out with a spade. You wouldn't get very far anyway because they made or built those convents so little nuns can NOT escape. That was their purpose in building them as they build them. And there's no way for us to get out unless God makes a way. But I believe God's making a way for numbers of little girls after they come out of the convent.

A NEW KIND OF VOW

Alright, now when the time comes, I think I was 18 when the mother began talking to me, now I planned to come out, see, after my white veil. I wanted to be a little nursing sister in the Roman church, but the mother superior, I suppose she was watching my life, I supposed she realized I had much endurance. I had a strong body and I believe the woman was watching me because one day she asked me to come into her office and she began to tell me, "Charlotte, you have a strong body." And she said, "I believe you have the possibilities of making a good nun, a cloistered nun. I believe you're the type that'd be willing to give up home, give up Mother and Daddy, give up everything you love out in the world, and the world (so to speak) and hide yourself behind convent doors, because I believe you're the kind that would hide back there and be willing to sacrifice and live in crucial poverty that you might pray for lost humanity."

She said, "I believe you're the kind that'd be willing to suffer."

We are taught to believe as nuns that we suffer our loved ones and your loved ones that are already in a priest's purgatory will be delivered from purgatory sooner because of our suffering. She knew I was willing to suffer. I didn't murmur. I didn't complain. She knew all of that and she's watching my life and that's the reason she began to tell me about the black veil. And then of course, you know I didn't know too much about a cloistered nun. I didn't know their lives. I didn't know how they live. I didn't know what they've done. But you know, this woman proceeded to tell me - now you hear a lot of people try to tell me in the various places where we travel and go, I hear a lot of Roman Catholics try to tell me "I've been in so many cloisters. I know all about them." But you know a Roman Catholic can lie to you and they don't have to go to confession and tell the priest about the lie that they've told because they're lying to protect their faith. They can tell any lie they want to to protect their faith and never go the confessional box and tell the priest about it. They can do more than that. They can steal up to 40 dollars and they don't have to tell the priest about it. They don't have to say one word about it in the confessional box. They're taught that. Every Roman Catholic knows it and every Roman Catholic (you'd be horrified if you know how many of them) steal up to that amount. And many of them lie. We've dealt with them. I've dealt with hundreds and hundreds of them. I've seen good many of them fall in at the altar and cry out to God to save them. And, you know, before they're saved they look into my face and hold my hand and lie to me. But after God gets a hold of their heart then they want to make right what they've told me because they realize that they've lied about it. But as long as they're Roman Catholic they're permitted to lie. And it's the saddest thing. You can't expect them to know God because God does not condone sin. I don't care who you are. I don't believe God condones sin and I don't believe he's going to condone it in the Roman Catholic people, even though they are being mislead and they're being blinded and being led in the way that's going to lead them into a Devil's hell. I believe that will all of my heart because I've lived in a convent. I know something about how those people live and what they do.

Now the day comes. She told me, "Charlotte, you have to be willing to spill your blood as Jesus shed his upon Calvary." She said, "You'll have to be willing to do penance, heavy penance." She said, "You'll have to be willing to live in crucial poverty."

Now already I'm living in a bit of poverty, but I thought that was going to make me holy and draw me close to God and would make me a better nun. And so I'm willing to live in that poverty. And then, on this particular morning, she told me what I would be wearing. She said, "You'll spend nine hours in a casket" and she explained a number of things to me. That's the most I knew about it and I didn't find that out until I'd taken my white veil. And so, on this particular morning I'm 21 years of age. But 60 days previous to my being 21 years of age, I'm going to sign some papers that they've placed in front of me. And those papers are this: I'm going to sign away every bit of inheritance that I might have received from my family after their death. Of course I signed that over to the Roman Catholic Church. And oftentimes I say the Roman Catholic priests are enticing girls, not only their background, not only their strong bodies, their strong minds, and strong wills, but he's enticing girls where mothers and fathers have much property and they are comfortably fixed with the material things of this life. Why? Because when that child enters the convent, they're going to get a portion of her money, of her father's money and I often say that even salvation in the Roman Catholic Church is going to cost you plenty of money. More than you know anything about. And so they don't mind commercializing off of that child and the inheritance that would have come to her. And so on this particular morning I told the mother superior, "Give me a little while to think it over." She didn't make me do it. No one did. But I thought it over for a couple years and then one day I told her, "I think I'm going to hide away behind the convent doors because I believe I could give more time to God. I could pray more."

NINE HOURS IN A CASKET

I believed I could be in a position where I could inflict more pain upon my body because we are taught to believe that God smiles down out of heaven as we do penance, whatever the suffering might be. And I didn't know any better because I often say, "If you could only look into the hearts of little nuns, if you are a Christian you would immediately cry out before God in behalf of those little girls," because to me we are heathens. It doesn't make any difference, the amount of education we have. We are still heathens. We know nothing about this lovely Christ, nothing about the plan of salvation. And we're living as hermits in the convent.

And so on this particular morning I come walking down an aisle again….And may I say the morning before, I can't go into it too deeply because I never would be able to cover enough of it so you could understand it, but this morning I'm walking down that aisle, but I don't have a wedding garment on. I have a funeral shroud. It's made of dark red velvet and it's way down to the floor. And I'm walking down that aisle. I know what I'm going to do. The casket is already made by the nuns of the cloister of very rough boards. It is sitting right out here and I know when I come down there I'll step in that casket and lay my body down and I'm going to spend nine hours in there. And two little nuns will come and cover me up with a heavy black cloth we called a heavy drape mortel(?) and you know it's so heavily incensed that I feel like I've smothered to death. And I have to stay there. Now I know when I come out of that casket I'll never leave the convent again. I know I'll never see my mother and father again. I'll never go home again. I'll always live behind convent doors and when I die my body will be buried there. They told me that, so I knew it even before I done it. It's a great price to pay, then to find out that convents are not religious orders as we were taught and as we were trained. It's quite a disappointment to a young girl that's given her life to God, and willing to give up so much and sacrifice so much. I'll assure you, it was a disappointment. And so after I spent those nine hours - you'll say, "What'd you do while you lay in that casket?"

REMEMBERING HOME

What do you think I did? I spilled every tear in my body. I remembered every lovely thing my mother done for me. I remembered her voice. I remembered the gathering around the table. I remembered the times when she would pray with us. I remembered the things that she said to me. I remembered what a marvelous cook she was. Everything as a little girl growing up in that home, I remembered it. Laying in that casket, knowing I'll never hear her voice again and I'll never see her face again. I'll never put my feet under her table again and enjoy her good cooking. I knew all that and so maybe for four hours I spilled all the tears in my body because it was so hard and I knew I'd get homesick. I knew I'd want to see her someday, but I gave it all up. What for? For the love of God, I thought. I didn't know any better. And I'll assure you those were nine long hours. And then I seemingly got a hold of myself and I thought this, "Charlotte, now you're going to make the best Carmelite nun!" Because everything I've done, even (now) that I'm out of the convent, I do give my best. I try to give everything that I have regardless what I might do. And so I did in the convent. I gave the best that I had. And I wanted to be the best nun that I could possible be. And the mother superior knew that and, don't worry, the priest knew all about that too.

SIGNATURE IN BLOOD

Now I realized after I walk out of that casket or come out of it they're going to take me like this, over here, and right back here there's a room. We call it the mother superior's room. Now I've never been in that particular room, so I don't know what she has in there. But, you know, when I walk in there this time the mother superior sits me down in a straight backed, hard-bottomed chair and immediately then I'm going to take three vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience. And you know, as I take those vows she opens a little place in the lobe of my ear and she takes out a portion of blood because I must sign every vow in my own blood. And after that happened I'm going to take the vow of poverty. Now when I sign that vow I sign it thus and I'm willing to live in crucial poverty the balance of my live, as long as I live. And what that poverty is like, of course we [the nuns undergoing initiation] don't know. And then my next vow, I'm going to vow of chastity. And you know this vow, of course you know what it means. I'm taught to believe that I'm married to Jesus Christ. I'm his bride. I'll always remain a virgin. I'll never legally marry again in this world because I have become the spouse or the bride of Jesus Christ. After the bishop married me to Christ he placed the ring on my finger and that meant I'm sealed to Christ. I'm married to him and I accepted it because I didn't know any better. And now here I am taking a vow that I would always remain a virgin because I'm the bride of Christ. And I want you to listen carefully. And then, of course my last vow - of obedience. Now when we signed that vow, I'll assure you already I know what obedience means. I'm living in a convent and there they demand absolute obedience. You don't get by with anything, not even for two minutes. I mean you don't get by with it. You have to realize what obedience means and they demand it and you learn to know it and you're much wiser the more quickly you learn it and you obey it and you give them absolute obedience.

Alright, now what does it mean to assign vows like this? Let me tell you this. It means more than you folk will ever know because most people that I know anything about, they know very little about obedience. Oh in a sense, yes, but you'll never know what a little nun knows about obedience, I'll assure you that one thing unless you lived in the convent. Alright, that particular vow, when I signed it in my own blood, it done something to me because after I signed those vows do you realize that I've signed away everything that I have? My human rights. I have become a mechanical human being now. I can't sit down until they tell me to. I don't dare to get up until they tell me to. I can't lie down until they tell me to and neither do I dare to get up. I cannot eat until they tell me to. And what I see, I don't see. What I hear, I don't hear. What I fell, I don't feel. I've become a mechanical human being, but you're not aware of that until you have signed all these vows. Then you realize, "Here I am, a mechanical human being." And of course I belonged to Rome now, I'll assure you that right now.

Alright, after these particular vows we become forgotten women of the convent. In just a short while you'll understand what I'm talking about. Now immediately after I've taken those vows then the mother superior is going to give me - take away from me, my name and give me the name of a patron saint. And she teaches me to believe that whatever happens to me in the convent I can pray to that patron saint and she will intercede and get my prayers through to God because I'm not holy enough to stand in the presence of God. It is no wonder the dear little nuns can never get close enough to God. We've always been taught that we'll never be holy enough to stand in His presence and we always have to go through somebody else in order to get a prayer through to God. And we believe it because we don't know any better. And so now, all identification of who Charlotte was is going to be put away. It'll be taken away from me, and if you would come into the convent and call for my family name, they'd tell you there isn't such a person there. I don't exist, even though I'm right there, because I'm writing under another name.

Now the mother superior is going to cut every bit of hair off of my head, and when she cuts it with the scissors she puts the clippers on it. And I mean there's nothing left. I don't have one speck of hair left on my head. And of course if you could be a nun then you'd understand the heavy headgear that we have to wear - it'd be so cumbersome to have hair and so cumbersome to take care of it. We don't have any ways of taking care of it in the convent. There are no combs in the convent. And so you can imagine how hard it would be for us to take care of a head of hair. It's not necessary that we have a comb after they've finished with it. Alright, now this is my black veil, these are my perpetual vows, we'll call them. I'm there and I'm going to stay there.

Now, you know, up until this time, once a month I received a letter from my family and I wrote a letter out of the convent once a month to my family, even though when I'd write that letter I had no doubt they marked out a lot of it because when I would receive a letter from my family there was so much of it blacked out until there was no sense to the letter and, oh, I'd weep over those black marks. I was wondering what my mother was trying to say to me. Don't worry. You'll never get to know what she wanted to say to you because they have blacked it out. And so they break your heart many, many times and you're lonely anyway because you have no friends in the convent. I'll assure you, even though there was 180 on my particular wing, not one of those nuns was my friend and neither was I friend to them because we are not allowed to be friends in the convent We are all policemen or detectives watching each other. That's so we'll tell. And the little nun that finds something to tell on the other nun, she stands in good favor with the mother superior. And then the mother teaches that nun to believe (that) when she stands in good favor with the mother superior she is standing in good favor with God. And so that little nun, of course, will want that and she'll tell a lot of things, maybe that are not even true, on the other little nuns.

Alright. Now after all of this has transpired and all of this has happened everything I have is gone. I've sold my soul for a mess of theological pottage, because not only are we destroyed in our bodies. Many of us in our minds. And many of us, if we die in the convent, we've lost our souls. And so it's a serious thing and I'll surely covet your prayers for little cloistered nuns behind convent doors. They'll never hear this gospel. They'll never know the Christ that you folk know tonight or today. They'll never pray to him as you people pray to him. They'll never feel his blessings as you people feel them. And so put them on your hearts and pray for them. They surely need much prayer.

OUTRAGEOUS ASSAULT

Alright Now as I walk into this room and all of this is transpiring, now, bless your hearts, I don't know what's going to be in the next room after this has transpired and I have taken the vows that I will always remain a virgin, I'll never legally marry in this world because I'm the spouse of Christ. And then, after this, the mother superior leads me out into another room or, rather, she opens the door and I'm to be sent into that room. And when I walk out in that room I see something I have never seen before. I see a Roman Catholic priest dressed in a holy habit. And he walks over to me and he locks his arm in my arm which he has never done in the first part of my convent life. I never had a priest to insult me in any way. I never had one of them to be even unkind to me in the first part of my convent experience. But here he is now, and of course I didn't understand what it was all about and I didn't know what in the world the man really expected of me. And, you know, I pulled from him because I felt highly insulted. And I pulled from him and I said, "Shame on ya!" And I made him very angry for a minute and he said, uh, immediately the mother superior must have heard my voice because she came out immediately and she said, "Oh," (and they called me by my church name) she said, "After you've been in the convent a little while you won't feel this way. The rest of us felt the same way you do and you know the priest's body is sanctified, and therefore it is not a sin for us to give the priests our bodies."

In other words, they teach every little nun this: As the Holy Ghost placed the germ in Mary's womb and Jesus Christ was born, so the priest is the Holy Ghost and therefore it isn't a sin for us to bear his children. And let me tell you, that's what they come to the convent for. For no other purpose in all of this world do priests come into the convent but to rob those precious little girls of their virtue. And I'll assure you, we'll be telling you a little later in the testimony what they really do after they come in under those particular deals. But may I say now every bridge has been burned out from under me. There's no way back. I can't get out of the convent even though I've pled. Oh, how I pled with that priest! "Send for my father, I want to go home! I don't want to go any farther." And let me tell you, that's when you stand alone. You don't know who to turn to and you're a victim of circumstances and you'll live in the convent because there is no other way to get out of the convent. And I'll assure you, I stayed in the convent until God made a way for me to come out.

And so, after all of this, my mail was stopped. I'll never receive another bit of mail from my family. Never another letter. I belong to the pope. I belong to Rome. And then, after all of this, the mother superior after taking these particular vows and the priest has invited me to go to the bridal chamber. You say, "Did you go?" No. Definitely not. I didn't enter the convent to be a bad woman. It would have been much easier to have stayed out of the convent to be a bad woman. You wouldn't go into the convent and live in the poverty we live in and to suffer as we suffered to be a bad woman. No girl would do that and it would have been much easier to stay out of the convent if I wanted to be a bad woman, but I went there to give my life and heart to God and that was the only purpose I had in going there. And here this priest is, and of course I didn't go to the bridal chamber with him. I had a strong body then. One of us would have been wounded because I would have fought until the last drop of blood. And you know it made them very, very angry I'll assure you because I didn't go to the bridal chamber with him.

FUNERAL DUTY, A BROKEN RULE, PUNISHMENT IN A DUNGEON

Now I'm going to have to go to penance the next morning and of course this will be a heavier penance because of what I done already. And when the mother superior says, "We're going to do penance" the next morning I'm going to be initiated as a Carmelite nun. And I remember when she walked me down into that particular place it was a dark room. Remember, I lived above, one the first floor until my black veil. After the black veil they take me one story under the ground. And I lived from there on, until God delivered me, under the ground. I didn't live in the top part of this building at all. You know, as we walked into this room it's dark and it's very cold. And when we walked in we came from back there somewhere and we come walking to the front and I walked alongside the mother superior and when we got near the front I saw those little candles burning. Anywhere in the convent you'll find the seven candles burning. And when I came a little closer I saw the candles but I couldn't see anything else and I wondered, "What's she going to do to me?" That's the thing in our hearts and we can't get away from it because we have fear.

And when I come a little closer I saw something lying on a board there. And you know when I came real close then I realized, here's a little nun lying on that board. I'll call it a cooling board because it was that. And just as long as her body. And there she was and when I could see where the candles flickered down on her face I realized, "That child is dead!" And oh, I wanted so much to say, "How did she die? Why is she here? How long do you keep her here?" But you remember I signed away every human right and so I can't say one word, but I stood looking. And the mother superior said, "You stand vigil over this dead body for one hour." And at then end of the hour a little bell is tapped and another nun will come to relieve me. And may I say I was advised every so many minutes I have to walk out in the front of that little body and sprinkle holy water and ashes over the body and say, "Peace be unto you."

And I did exactly what they told me to do. Oh, it was a terrible feeling. I'm not afraid of the dead. It's the live people we have to be very cautious about. And I wasn't afraid of that little dead nun, but oh, my heart ached for her. And you know after the bell tapped and I realized my hour is gone the nun who comes to relieve us comes back here somewhere and of course she walks on her tiptoes. No noise is made in the convent and they don't speak, they just touch you. And, of course, my being down there with that little dead nun I was full of fear. Well that girl laid a hand on my shoulder, I let out a scream, a horrible scream from fear, just fear. I didn't mean to do it. I didn't break that rule on purpose, but I was scared.

And immediately, of course I had to come before the mother superior and that's when I first learned to know, one of the first times about a dungeon. They didn't tell me there were dungeons in the convent. And she put me in such a dirty dark place with no floor in it for three days and nights. And I didn't get any food and any water, and I'll assure you, I didn't scream any more. I tried so hard not to break the rules of screaming because there is a dungeon and I know they'll put you in it. And let me tell you right now, it's not a nice place to be. After you've been in one of those places, you'll know what it feels like.

Alright, now, I'll say this now before I go any further, that popery is a masterpiece of Satan. I said it's a masterpiece of Satan with his lying wonders and his traditions and his deceptions. It's a terrible thing when you know about it.

And so, as I come down into this room and she took me and let me look at this little girl, and that particular, we call it a penance is over. Now the very next morning she said again to me, "Charlotte, you're going to do penance." (Not the next morning, it was three days afterwards because I spent three days and nights in the dungeon). So the fourth, fifth morning, whichever it was she said, "You're going to do penance."

She took me down into another room. Not the same room. And when we come walking down this time I could see that big piece of wood but I didn't know what it was. And when I came a little closer there was a cross. It was made of heavy timber. I might say it was eight or ten feet high. Very heavy. And that cross was sitting on an incline like that. And she had me walk over here at the base of the cross and she said, "Now strip your clothes off." And I took my clothes off down to my waistline. Then she made me drape my body over the foot of that cross and she pulled my hands underneath and bound them to my feet. That's where I'm going to spill my blood. She had not told me how, and neither could I ask how I would spill it. She gave two little nuns that came with her, a flagellation whip. I might call it a bamboo pole. It's about this long, it's about that big around, and it has six straps on it about this long. On the end of either (each) of those straps there's a crossed piece of sharp metal. And those little nuns, each was given one of those whips and they stood on either side of the cross. At the same time those girls began whipping my body. And I mean when that metal hit my body it would break the hide of course. It would cut into the flesh and I spilled blood. It was running down to the floor. That's my flagellation whipping. That is where I spill my blood as Jesus did upon Calvary. And of course I'm human, it wounded, it hurt! It was very painful.

After the whipping is over, they don't bathe my body. They put my clothing back on my body and I have to go the rest of the day. When the night comes and I stand in front of my cell there, after we have to stand there to undress with our backs to each other, then when I went in, oh, I couldn't sleep that night. I wasn't a bit sleepy because I couldn't take off all my clothes. They had dried in those wounds and it was terrible. I didn't take them off for several nights. And I'll assure you that when I came before my food I didn't want my cup of black coffee.

A NINE-DAY PENANCE

In the morning we get a cup of black coffee they serve in a tin cup and we can have no milk or no sugar of any type and we have one slice of bread. That's made by the nuns of the cloister. They weigh it. It weighs four ounces [113 g.]. That's all I get for breakfast. And then, of course, in the evening I get a bowl of soup, and that's fresh vegetables cooked together (there's no seasoning in the soup whatsoever) and a half a slice of bread and three times a week they give me a half a glass of skim milk. That consists of my food 365 days in the year. And I began loosing weight very rapidly, I'll assure you, because I didn't have enough food to eat. I don't know the day that I went to bed without a hungry stomach. Sometimes it would be so hungry I couldn't sleep. The pain was gnawing. You can't hardly stand it and you know you're only going to get that one slice of bread the next morning. That doesn't fill you up.

And of course, we have to work hard all day long. And I'll assure you, those little nuns, and I covet your prayers for them, they need your prayers in more ways than one because you'll go to bed with a full stomach tonight and you're very comfortable right now. But I'll assure you, there's not one of them that's comfortable. They're hungry, and they're sick, and they're wounded, and they're hurt. They're heartsick and homesick and discouraged and, worst of all seemingly, they have no hope. No hope. You and I are looking forward to the day when we're going to see Jesus. They have no hope whatsoever and I surely hope you don't forget to pray for them. Alright that was terrible. I'll assure you.

Then in a few mornings after this, the mother superior is taking me back for another initiation. And when I go into the penance chamber this morning we come from a place up here and we're going to walk along like that clear to the back. And you know, it was quite a ways back there and I went through - part of it's a tunnel. And then I come out into a room and I'll walk through that railing. When I get way back there I see those candles burning and I see something else. There's ropes hanging down from the ceiling and, oh, I'm so scared! I wonder what the ropes are for and what she's going to do. After these two penances, you began to have a lot of fear in your heart. And so I can't say anything and I walk back there and, you know, I saw the ropes then real plain. What they're doing hanging down from that ceiling?

Then she tells me, "You go over there against the wall." About that close from the wall and I have to stand sideways like this. Then she asks me to put up both of my thumbs and I did. And then she pulled one rope down and there's a metal band fastened securely and she fastens that around the joint of my thumb. Then the other one comes down and fastens around this thumb. And there I'm standing like this, facing the wall and then, you know, she comes over here to the end and there's a, uh, whatever you want to call it. She starts winding, and I start moving! And she's taking me right up in the air. And, you know, when she gets me so just my toes are on the floor, just on my tiptoes, she fastens it. And there I hang. And all the weight of my body is on my thumbs and on my toes. Not a word is said. No one speaks a word. And she walks out of that room and locks the door. If you know what it means to hear a key lock in a door and know that I'm strung up there like that! You'll never know unless you're a nun. And when that woman walked out I didn't know how long I'll stay there, how long that woman would leave me there. And, you know, they didn't come to give me food. They brought me no water. And I thought, "Is this it? Am I going to die back here just like this?"

And within a few hours, you can imagine, I'm still a human being, my muscles began to scream out with the pain. I was suffering. And woman let me hang. Nobody came near. And what good would it do for me to cry? You can spill every tear in your body. Nobody will hear you. There's nobody there to care how many tears you spill. And so I just hung there. And finally I began to, seemingly, I felt like I couldn't stand it. I'll surely die if they don't come and get me quickly! And I felt as if I was beginning to swell.

I don't know how long went by and she opened the door one morning and she had something for me to eat and the water was in a pan. And it was potatoes, and those potatoes were not good to eat. They were in a pan. And there's a shelf over there on the wall that she can adjust to the height of the nun. And you know, she pulled it up. Now (recall) I'm not against the wall. I'm about this far from it. But you get that food. She puts it there and says, "This is your food." And she walks out.

Now, how am I going to get it? She didn't let my hands down. But this is what you'll learn and you'll struggle to get it. I'm hungry. I'm so thirsty I feel like I'm going mad. And to get it, I discovered that this hand goes high and this one will come down a little bit. And that'll keep on going higher as I lean I have to reach higher with this one. This one (the other) will automatically let down. And to get that water and that food I mean I had to get it like the dogs and cats. And I lapped as much of it as I could because I am so thirsty. And get those potatoes? I tried as hard as I could because I'm hungry! I mean I'm hungry! And I got as much of it as I could, naturally. But I was hungry! That's the way she fed me for a while, and then she released the bonds on my hands and on my feet - (I shouldn't have said on my feet). She didn't release the bonds. She let me hang there for nine days and nine nights. (I almost got it mixed up with one of the other penances I want to give to you). I hung nine days and nine nights in this position and, may I say, the time come when I was so swollen here (and naturally I could see myself puffing out here) I felt like my eyes were coming out of my head. I felt like my arms were apart. I could see on them right there they were two or three size their normal size. I felt like I was that way all over my body and I was like a boil. I was in real suffering.

And then on the ninth day she comes in and she releases the bonds from my hands and my body and lets me down on the floor. Now I go down, I can't walk. I'll assure you I didn't walk. I didn't walk for a long time. But you know what? There's two little nuns, they carry me out. One gets under my feet, one gets under my shoulders and they carry me in to the infirmary and they lay me on a slab of wood, and there they cut the clothing from my body. And let me tell you right now, nobody but God will ever know! I'm covered with vermin and filth. Why? I'm hanging there in my own human filth. There are no toilet facilities [in the penance chamber]. Right behind me is a stool and they had running water in it and the lid is down and they have sharp nails driven through that lid. If I break my ropes and fall on that, I would suffer terribly! And this is the life of a little nun behind cloister doors after they've already deceived us, disillusioned us, and got us back there, then this is the life that we're living and these are the things that we're going to have to do. And I'll assure you, it isn't anything funny.

DAILY ROUTINE

And then I remember as I lived on in that place, oh let me tell you! In the morning we have to get up out of our beds at 4:30 in the morning. The mother superior taps a bell and that means five minutes to dress and may I say to you folk, it's not five and a half minutes. You better get that clothing on in five minutes. I failed one time and I had to be punished severely, but I never failed again in all the years in the convent. And you know, when we are finished dressing, then we're going to start marching. And we march by the mother superior and that mother superior's going to appoint us to an office duty every morning. It might be scrubbing. It might be ironing. It might washing. It might be doing some hard work. But I have to work one hour, then we'll go in and gather around the table and we'll find, sitting in front of us, our tin cup full of coffee and our slice of bread.

And then, of course, we have hard work to do. We have, I think there was 12 tubs in the convent that I lived in, and we washed on the old-fashioned washboard. We have the old flat iron that you heat on the stove. And you know, it wouldn't be so bad if we just had our own clothing in the convent, but the priests bring great bundles of clothing and put them in there because they can get them done for nothing. And we have to do that clothing on top of it. We work very, very hard, and they [the nuns] are not able to work because they don't have enough food to eat, food to keep body, mind, and soul together. And these little girls are living under those particular circumstances. Well, I say we're women without a country, and I mean just exactly what I say, women without a country. Now we belong to the pope. Anything they want to inflict upon my body they can do it. And all the howling I do, if I should howl, it wouldn't make any difference because nobody's going to hear me, and they have no idea that I'll ever leave the convent. The plan is I'll die there and be buried there.

Now you say, "Charlotte, can you go into the convent?" Any one of you folk can go into an open order convent or a closed convent into the speak room, and there is an outside chapel that you can walk into, of any that I know anything about. But don't you just go in there and wander around to have some place to go, because you might meet something you're not expecting. If you go in there, you go prepared to take food to some little girl that's in there, and be sure that you know who you're taking it to. And when you go, as you walk up toward the front of the building like this, you'll see a bell, and you'll know what to do because it'll tell you. And you press a button there and there'll be a gate swing out. It has about three shelves on it. And, of course you've brought something for someone that you know in the convent. It might be the mother coming to visit her daughter. And you know, when that bell is tapped the mother superior is back here behind a big black rail. Now that's a big iron gate there's heavy folds of black material clear across there and you can't go back there. You'll never see the mother superior, but she'll answer you behind the black veil. And you might say, "I've brought some homemade candy for my daughter" and you might ask the mother superior to let you speak to her. You can't see here, but you can speak to her.

You know, the mother will call that lovely little girl and call her out on the other side of the rail. You can't see her. And you know what? The mother will speak to her and say, "Honey, are you happy here?"

And that little nun will say, "Mother, I am very happy."

You say, "Why did she say that?" Well, bless your heart! Don't you know that the mother superior is standing there and if we didn't say that, after our mother is gone, then only God knows what the mother superior will do to the little nun, and so we must lie to our mother. Then the mother will say, "Do you have plenty to eat?" And that little nun will answer and say, "We have plenty to eat." But, I'll tell you, that mother will go home. She'll prepare a lovely meal for the rest of the family, but if she could look in and see our table and see what her little girl is eating, if she could look into her little girl's eyes after she's been there for four years, she'd see those eyes are back in her head. She'd see that her little body's begun to waste away. I'll assure that mother, she'll never eat another meal at home. No never. You'd never enjoy another meal if you could see your child after she's in a convent for a period of time. But these things, of course, are under cover and we have to take what they give us.

LAUNDRY DUTY

Alright, now they can make us do anything. Here we are, the mother superior and I might be down in the laundry room, washing. (And I told you how we washed). And it's a cement floor. Doing the type of laundry we do, some of it's very heavy. The water slops out on the floor and, oh it's such a mess! We'd walk in it and you know, then here comes the mother superior and to me, a mother superior, I'd just as soon you'd turn loose a lion that's very hungry and let it come walking down that aisle as to see a mother superior in a convent. I was scared to death of her. Every time I saw that woman somebody had to suffer and we're afraid of her and she knows that we're afraid of her because she's cruel, I'll say her heart is callused. And here she comes. And there we are washing. And I tell you when she comes (and we know her, we feel her presence. Before you ever see her you know her footstep), and you know, we'll wash a little harder. But when she gets down to you, wherever you are, she might address me, and she'll say, "You come out here." And I'm out there like a flash because I'm scared. And then she'll say, "Prostrate yourself down and lick so many crosses on that floor." That's a cement floor! And of course I have to prostrate my body and lick those crosses, and those are not little tiny crosses. As far as I reach I have to lick those crosses. And she watches my countenance. If I don't like it and she knows I that I don't like it then she might say, "Ten." She might say, "Twenty-five." And then, you know, the next morning she might walk back there again, and because she saw something in my face that made her to know I didn't like what she wanted me to do she may call me again. My tongue by this time may be sore. It's bleeding, but I have to lick those crosses on the floor again. And then they do the same way about compelling us to crawl. They'll compel you to crawl, and I, may I say, it could be up and down an aisle like this ten times.

We know nothing about this lovely gospel of Jesus Christ. And so we have to do these things. Then the mother superior might walk through the cell door. By the way, in our cell, there's nothing in there but the Virgin Mary, that is, she's holding the baby Jesus, and there's a crucifix, and then we have a prayer board. And by the way, I'll assure you folk, you'll never want to lean on our prayer board. We lean on it every day if we are able to walk under our own power. It is a board about this high from the ground and there are two leaning up like this one. And this one is about this wide and I'm going to drop my knees down on it and there are sharp wires coming up through that board. And then, this one up here, I'll prostrate my arms on. There's going to be sharp wires. After all, I told you we were going to suffer. We were going to do penance, and this is a part of my suffering. As I kneel on that prayer board I'm praying for lost humanity and I'm believing, as I suffer, that my grandmother will be released from a priest's purgatory sooner because of my suffering. And I'll kneel there longer sometimes. It's terrible. We don't know any better, so we'll do that because that's all that little nun does know, and we believe it.

And there we are, and we are locked in our cells. Every night the key is turned in those doors. We can't get up and come out of there. Then, more than that, seven minutes of twelve (We go to bed at 9:30. The lights are out), seven minutes of twelve there's two little nuns appointed to unlock every door. Every little nun again gets on her feet, dresses in full dress, goes into the inner chapel and there we again pray one hour for lost humanity. We don't get very much sleep. That's why. And we don't get enough food and we work hard and we suffer much. That's why our bodies are so broken. That's why we seemingly don't have enough strength to carry on after we've lived there.

LOSING HER RELIGION

But, I'd like to say this before I go on any farther. Now I did those very things. We are taught to believe that as we spill our own blood (now we must do this), as I whip my body, if I torment it or torture it in any way that I spill blood, I'm taught to believe that I'll have 100 less days to spend in purgatory. Now you know we have no hope. Those little nuns don't look forward to anything. You may think they do, but we don't. Why? After you live in a convent 10 years, I began to realize the Virgin Mary is just a piece of metal. She's a statue. I began to realize St. Peter's just a statue. I began to realize that the statue of Jesus is just a piece of metal. In other words we come to the place to believe that our God is a dead god. And I'll assure you, after you live in a convent long enough, not at first, oh no, but after we've suffered enough, after we've fallen down at the feet of those statues and spilled our tears on them and have begged them to intercede and get a prayer through to God and years go by with no answer from them whatsoever. A parent won't even know when they're dead. So who's going to pray us out of purgatory? Or, rather, buy us out of purgatory?

No, we realize after we're in there for a period of time that there is no purgatory. Of course, you know there isn't and I know there isn't, and there is no purgatory. The only purgatory the Roman Catholic people have is the priest's pocket, and they're filling his pockets with coins in order to pray for the dead. And may I say there are thousands and thousands of Roman Catholics in the month of November, may I say to you, in the United States two years ago in the month of November the Roman Catholic priests prayed masses for the dead of the Roman Catholic people of this country in one month collected 22 million dollars for masses said for dead Roman Catholics. That's just a little idea or sample of what's going on in this country, and still there are thousands of mothers that will work their fingers to the bone to go over there and give the priest another five dollars to say a mass for loved one that is in purgatory, because that mother believes there is a purgatory.

In the convent they have a painting of purgatory, and there's nothing in the room but just that painting. And you know, every Friday we have to walk around that painting. And when we walk around it, I would you could look at the little nuns faces. What do I see? The painting, as you would walk around it, looks like its a big deep hole out there and there are people down in there, and the flames of fire are lapping around the bodies of those people, and their hands are outstretched like this, and the mother will say to the little nuns, "You better go and put another penance on your body. Those people are begging to get out of that fire."


And because we're heathens, we don't know any better. I might go someplace in the convent and maybe I'll burn my body real bad. Maybe I'll torture some way and spill some more blood, because as I suffer I believe that they're going to get out of that place where a priest puts them. And there are millions of people so to speak, in purgatory that your priests have put there and when he know that it is the biggest fraud in the world. He knows there's not a bit of truth to it. And, bless your heart, I often say if you take purgatory and mass away from the Roman Catholic Church you'll rob her of nine-tenths of her living. She'll starve to death if you would take it away from her. She commercializes, not only off of the living, but off of the dead. And on and on it goes.

THE PRIESTS

Alright. It doesn't bother a mother superior to take one of those dear little girls, and may I say, you know, when the priests come into the convent they come as our father-confessors. Once a month we go to confession, and (we don't want to go, don't you worry!) I've many a time got in the back row. I didn't want to go in there. I know who's out there. One of them, (I may not know the particular man, but I know he's a priest), and I know those priests. I certainly have seen them enough. I've lived there long enough. I certainly have had contact with every one of them. And I'll assure you this one thing, I don't trust one single one of those in the convent. Now, we're not telling you about all the priests. I don't know all the priests. I'm just talking about the convent in my personal testimony about convent life, and you know we know something about what's out in that room. Here we are. We know we're going to confession today. It may take all day long. And here he comes, and I have never seen a Roman Catholic priest come into the convent that I was in without intoxicating liquor under his belt. And I say a man or a woman, regardless of who you may be, when you get liquor under your belt, you are not a man, neither are you a woman. You become an animal and a beast. And so we have a beast sitting out there. There's a straight-backed, hard-bottomed chair. No other furniture but the crucifix and the Virgin Mary, but here he is sitting on that chair right out there in the middle of that room. Now here a little girl has to walk out there alone, and she has to kneel down. Think of it! Why bless your heart, I really sometimes, I'm saved now, I'm out of the convent and I now look back at that Roman Catholic priest and I often say, "I'm sure he was a twin brother to the devil because he's full of sin. He's full of vice. He's full of corruption."

And we go out there and we kneel down at his knees. Now you are a lucky girl if you get away from that man without being destroyed. Why, he's drunk. He's just a beast. He's not a man. Oh, he has a holy habit on. He's an ordained Roman Catholic priest, and so I'll assure you, we don't like to go to confession, but we must go once a month. And those little girls can't help themselves, and nobody comes out into that room but the priest and I until it's all over, and then we can come back and the next one will have to come. And I'll assure you, we don't appreciate that day. And those little girls don't know any better. They don't know anything about the plan of salvation. They don't know that Jesus went to Calvary and died for them. They don't know that he shed his blood for them. Those little girls know nothing about it, because to me, I'll repeat again, the Bible was a hidden book to every one of those little girls.

And so now they can do things like this. Now if a Roman Catholic priest comes into the convent, he may go to the mother superior and ask her to permit him to go into the cell where one of the nuns are. And you know, that mother with her carnal mind and her carnal heart, and she's very hard and very carnal, and she is the mother many times of many illegitimate children, they belong to the priest. And you know, she'll take that priest, and he drinking, she knows it. They bring liquor in with them. Sometimes some of the nuns will drink with them, and the mother usually drinks with them. (And it's really a terrible place, it is, not a religious order. It does not live up to that name whatsoever). But here she brings that priest into one of our cells. Now, I wonder if you realize how serious it is. That Roman Catholic priest, he has liquor under his belt. We know that. But he has a big strong body. He's had three square meals of food every day of his life. He can eat all the food that he wants. But you know, there's a little nun that may have a broken body, and she may not have very much strength. And what did he come into that cell for? For nothing other than to destroy that little nun.

I often say I wish the government could walk into a convent just about the time one of those priests are let into a cell. The mother will turn a key in the lock and you're locked in there with that priest. Now we have no way to defend ourselves, and I often say (I had to nurse those little girls. I'm an R.N. I got my nurse's training by going through the tunnel over to the hospital as I lived in an open order convent). But may I say that after that priest is taken out of there, if you could look upon the body of that little nun, she looks like something you'd throw out in a hog pen and a half dozen old sows had just mauled that child's body. And this is convent life! I can understand why your priests are calling over the phone every day or two and screaming their heads off because I'm in this city giving this testimony. But may I say to you, I don't mind if they continue to scream. I don't mind what they do. I'm not one bit afraid of them. I'll continue to give this testimony. As long as God gives me strength, I'll be giving this testimony regardless of your priests or your bishops in this country. I know what I'm doing. I know what I'm saying, and I'm not afraid of anybody in all of this world. I'm a child of God, and I believe God won't let anybody put a hand on me until my work is finished, and then I often say, I don't care what you do to my body after I leave this body. I'm sure I don't mind. So I will continue to give this testimony, regardless of what your priests think about it, because I think God saved me to pull the cover off of convents. I believe He saved me to uncloak those places that are riding under the cloak of religion. I believe that with all of my heart. I'll assure you I do.

Now, if I refuse to give my body (you know we are supposed to give our body voluntarily to those priests. Many times the nuns are overpowered), but if I refuse to give my body voluntarily to them, then you know he becomes very angry and he goes immediately to the